S: [crying in a pile in the floor] THERE. ARE. SO. MANY. TOYS. MOMMY.
M: Yes. Yes there are. This will be good to think about tomorrow during rest time. Maybe don't dump out all the baskets.
L: [crying in the doorway, where he hits his face and then cries harder] MOMMY THE TOYS AND THERE ARE TOO MANY AND I HIT MY FACE!
M: I'm sorry about your face. When it feels better, please go clean up the toys.
S: [crying from the bedroom] LINCOLN ISN'T HELPING. LINCOLN! HELP ME NOW.
L: [also crying from the bedroom] I AM HELPING! STOP CALLING ME A BABY!
S: Baby.
L: [screaming and crying from the floor of the bedroom] I'M NOT A BABY!
M: [crying on the couch] Boys, please PLEASE stop fighting and just CLEAN. Please?
That went on for an hour. (Really. An HOUR.) I called in the big guns and Rob went in and directed their cleaning. I guess I don't always know how to get kids to do things. I mean, it's not like they come with a manual. (Just 1 million parenting books that make you feel inadequate or angry in their self-righteousness.) Maybe I could write a manual now--or at least a chapter on how to get almost 3- and almost 5-year olds to clean their room. It would be a short chapter: just stand there and tell them what to do.
This week I've felt very children'd. Don't know what that means? First you need to go watch some Teen Girl Squad. Like TGS #3, featuring my favorite, as seen in this still. Or TGS #1, which is almost as good.
Sometimes, you get ----'d by stuff. Like MSG or arrows, or even children. With the utmost respect for Homestarrunner, I submit my own Teen Girl Squad comic. Which is what happens when Teen Girl Squad grows up and gets baby fever.
**NOTE. I don't know if I will get in trouble for making my own TGS. I figured if I linked to Homestarrunner like 10 times, I would be okay. Also, the following cartoon is not meant to be offensive if you are sensitive about pregnancy/babies/possums. It's a CARTOON.**
**PPS- I realized after making my cartoon that I confused The Ugly One with Whats-Her-Face. Oh, the horror! Rob says not to worry about it, but I plan to change it when I have time. Boo on me.**
**PPS- I realized after making my cartoon that I confused The Ugly One with Whats-Her-Face. Oh, the horror! Rob says not to worry about it, but I plan to change it when I have time. Boo on me.**
A few months later...
I think that CHILDREN'D should be a new term. It could be useful in so many ways. Like:
I'm sorry I'm late again for church. I got CHILDREN'D.
Why is my house so messy? It got CHILDREN'D.
I used to fit into those skinny jeans. Then I got CHILDREN'D.
I would love to go to dinner, but tonight I got CHILDREN'D.
You look really tired. You must have been CHILDREN'D.
So, my week involved a little bit of getting CHILDREN'D, coupled with pregnancy hormones and some stress from a lot of busy things to do. That explains the unshowered smell and the possibly dirty shirt I am wearing.
Hey, can you blame me? I got CHILDREN'D.
I laughed like Kiki on yelling goats. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThe goats still make me laugh. Glad you laughed at this!
DeleteAbsolutely hilarious! I've never heard of the Teen Girl Squad, though...I must be old ;). When my girls didn't want to clean up their toys, I'd pull out the video camera (yep, VHS, not digital) and tape the tears. It made them really mad, but they sure cleaned up a lot faster! Now that the nest is empty, I guess my excuse will have to be 'I got senior citizen'd!'
ReplyDeleteAnita, totally go watch the videos. They are weird and funny. I also like Senior Citizen'd! New catchphrase?
DeleteI love Teen Girl Squad! This is pretty amazing.
ReplyDeleteYay! Thanks! Glad it works for fans of the real TGS.
DeleteThat was great! You should start a series on your blog. I am guessing I am the one with the curly hair that got thicker then fell out - lol.
ReplyDeleteYour hair fell out? It's so thick! Mine is totally falling out after kids.
DeleteTGS is the best. I love the baby fever episode! It may be my new favorite!!
ReplyDeleteYES! I'm glad. :)
DeleteBrilliant. This cartoon totally made my day ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks! And thanks for sharing it.
DeleteHi! I've just recently started following you. I'm a friend of Ginny's (GiGi the Hop!) and love your blog!
ReplyDeleteThis post had me laughing so hard I almost wet my pants! (And thanks to birthing 3 children, that 'almost' is getting awfully close to 'actually'.)
My oldest is 3 and my youngest 3 months - there is SO much here that I can relate to! (Is it ok to end my sentence on your blog with a preposition?) I think most of my days, I've been "children'd". Explains so much.
I haven't thought about TGS or homestarrunner in like - a decade. (!) Thanks for the trip down memory lane and for the laugh!
Yay, Ginny! She's the best. I totally feel you about the pants-wetting. Er, almost wetting. You are way more CHILDREN'D than me! I'm glad to bring back the reminder of homestarrunner! I miss it, but forget to check like I once did.
DeleteWhen my daughter was young she would just sit there and cry when I told her to clean her room. It was too overwhelming for her. I finally figured out if I broke it down into sections then she could go and do that. When she was done with one section I would give her another section and so on. This way she was able to get the whole room done really quickly. We would make a game out of it to see how quick she could do each section. Each child is different so I have no idea if this would help you any. It's all normal - who really likes to clean their room? Not me either.
ReplyDeleteI love your cartoons!!!
ReplyDeleteI wanted to thank you for your interest in the "Chain Linky CLIMB" (BLOG HOP) - I have sent you an email regarding this.
Thanks so much!
Angie
godsgrowinggarden.com
This is pure awesome. Teen girl squad rocks. I am the "my body hurts" one.
ReplyDeleteLOL, I'm children'd over here too. ;)
ReplyDeleteVisiting today from Friday Chaos.
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